Dark Match

The Phoenix defeated Eddie Williams in a try-out match for Williams.

Uprising 004 Live from Saint Louis, Missouri!

'Game On' by Discipline begins to play as the words 'NLW' flash across the screen, followed by images of the last Uprising, where Black Phoenix won a battle royal to earn herself a shot at the Anarchy X championship and 'Venom' Xavier Lux defeated Kevin Heat to win the Path of Destiny tournament, as well as become the new NLW Champion! The scene cuts to ringside, with Jake Steel and Caelan Tyler.

Caelan Tyler: Hello and welcome to Uprising! Tonight should be interesting, with Triple M defending his Anarchy X championship against The Ice Man in a cage match, along with the presentation of the Path of Destiny trophy!

Jake Steel: Bah, that trophy ceremony isn't important, what I want to know is who the hell that guy was that had to stick his nose in everyone's business.

Caelan Tyler: He looked familiar, but I wasn't able to get a good look at him before security hauled him off.

Jake Steel: Well he better stay clear of NLW from here on out, we don't stand for that shit.

You can call him, 'Pimpster'

Caelan Tyler: Well, the voices in my head are saying we have a live shot out back of a limo arrival.

Jake Steel: So what? Every superstar who works here rides in a limo!

Caelan Tyler: I don't!

Jake Steel: Good one Caelan. You're gonna tell me you don't have a limo with a wine bar, HD TV, and three gorgeous women for each trip? Riiiight.

Caelan Tyler: No, I ... I really don't! See?

Caelan produces a small set of a keys with a rental tag attached. Jake examines it and reads it aloud.

Jake Steel: '2007 German Autobahn Smart Car?!' Dude, Caelan, NLW provides you with a shopping cart?!

Caelan Tyler: Well, what do you drive, Mr. Hot Shot?

Jake Steel: Uhm ... I ... uh, the same thing. Mmhmm. Let's go backstage to the limo now. We probably already missed its arrival.

Backstage, indeed a black stretch limo pulls into the parking area, but it drives on by the camera and into the parking garage. Suddenly, an odd looking vehicle - a stretch golf cart, of sorts - putters around the corner, humming along and screeching to a stop.

Jake Steel: OH look Caelan! Management heard your despair and bought you a stretch shopping cart! See, you're already moving up in the world.

Caelan Tyler: Bah! Who the hell could fit in that thing? I want to say it has tinted windows, but it looks like they're just lined with black garbage bags Jake.

Suddenly, the screen splits, showing the makeshift limo on the left and Josh Allen on the right. Allen is walking somewhere - a sign in front of him reads 'Tallahassee, Florida.' He's chatting on a phone.

Josh Allen: OK, my friend. I'm gonna start looking for Andy down here, but just in case, I need you to be on the lookout there. If you see him, you know what to do. If it can't be done, go for the next best thing. Take him out, amigo. Take ... him ... out.

On the left side of the screen, faint noise can be heard from the stretch golf cart, and then it shakes violently, rocking back and forth.

Josh Allen: I knew you'd be excited about this opportunity! We'll catch up next week, buddy. Are you wearing your shirt I had custom-ordered? ... Awesome! OK, get inside and find your hiding spot. If anyone asks, you're Jack Sullivan's second cousin.

Allen flips the phone shut and looks a piece of paper with Andy Murray's address.

Josh Allen: OK Murph, you better hope you're not here. It's time to end this once and for all.

The right side showing Allen disappears, and suddenly, the small door on the stretch golf cart opens.

Caelan Tyler: Oh God Jake, who is it? Former wrestler? Former management? A midget hitman?

The cameraman outside the arena trots closer to the makeshift vehicle as a small monkey slides out, looking around. Fans inside immediately erupt with excitement.

Caelan Tyler: HOLY SHIKAKA! It's CHIMPY! He's back! Jake, I can't believe it!

Jake Steel: The circus ... has officially arrived...

Chimpy slides on a pair of sunglasses to highlight the small shirt over his body that reads, 'Chimpster is a Pimpster.' He jumps up and down on both feet, then makes a beeline for the door, sliding inside with no one the wiser.

Caelan Tyler: Murray thought he had it made with his group of nobodies, but by golly, Josh Allen just placed the Ace up his sleeve! Is someone following El Chimpador?

Jake Steel: I'd hope not. Please, let's move on to what we're REALLY here for -- wrestling!

One Fall
Cade McCaffrey versus Pitbull

In her first singles match in NLW Cade kicks it off quickly, using a variety of strikes and kicks to keep Pitbull off guard. Pitbull is able to regain control, using a variety of suplexes and other moves to keep Cade preoccupied. Pitbull eventually tried to go for a submission, but Cade is able to pull it through into the Twister. Pitbull taps almost immediately after Cade locks in the submission.

Caelan Tyler: Cade picks up her first win here with a rather painful looking submission move.

Jake Steel: She should've just snapped him in half to spare us having to see Pitbull in a NLW ring again.

Say What You Mean…

The feed cuts to the backstage area where two fresh-faced, enthusiastic young men who both look to be aged on the good side of thirty. Both are clad in black NLW Entertainment t-shirts and one clasps a roll of cable in his hand; it's probably safe to assume that both are members of the ring crew. They stand idle in one of the arena's short yet cluttered corridors chatting to each other, probably neglecting some kind of duty that they should be carrying out.

Guy 1: Tell me about it Bryan; there sure are some weird-lookin' dudes roaming around this place tonight. I mean, have you seen that Pendragon guy? Looks like a fucking psychopath to me…

Bryan: Damn Johnny, is that the guy who's like, 200ft tall? Should probably keep our voices down, if he heard us… well, he looks like the kind of dude who'd eat guys like us for breakfast…

Johnny nods with a chortle.

Johnny: Come on man, nobody around here's going to lay a finger on us, are they? Sullivan would shit a chicken. There's not too many guys in the area willing to do what we do on the wages we're on, is there?

Johnny's confidence is met with a shrug of the shoulders from Bryan.

Bryan: I suppose you've got a point, but we should probably be a little bit more careful is all I'm saying.

Johnny: Relax Bry, it's all good. But what about this Drake Hazard cat that showed up last week? Whaddaya know of him?

Bryan: Ummm, not a lot… he's not on the roster; probably wont ever be with Sully around. He's a fucking psychopath, I know that much...

Johnny nods.

Johnny: Well, I heard he was a real dickhead behind the scenes; a real arrogant type, you know?

Glancing over Johnny's shoulder, Bryan notices a figure pacing slowly towards the two backstage workers. Thinking nothing of it, he quickly re-adjusts his gaze in Johnny's direction; he'd completely missed what Johnny had just said to him, but gave a short nod so as not to give him the impression that he had been ignoring him.

Johnny: I heard he had to send out promo tapes to twenty places before he finally got a call back, that's how bad his reputation is! Every place he's worked all he's done is upset people and piss the management off…

The figure draws ever closer to Johnny and Bryan, and again he draws Byran away from the conversation.

Bryan: Eh, right Johnny…

Johnny: He must be a heck of a competitor for though, given all the baggage he apparently carries around with him. I don't know about you, but I don't think I'd be wholly comfortable with an asshole like that hanging around backstage.

Bryan: Johnny, you know what I said about running your mouth?

Completely ignoring his colleague's concerns, Johnny continues to ramble.

Johnny: I mean, I don't get paid to take shit and put up with the over-inflated egos of some of these so-called 'wrestlers,' I'm here to do a jo-

Johnny is interrupted mid-rant.

Drake Hazard: Ya havin' a good time there, boy?

The beast stood behind Johnny like a vulture. Somewhat taken aback by the interruption Johnny swings around to find the former CWF grappler standing very, very close to him. With a snide smile across his face Drake glances town at the ring crew member with contempt, knowing how easily he'd find it to snap him like a twig. Drake was clad in a pair of blue jeans, some black boots and a black t-shirt. His arm muscles were bulging like a motherfucker, and the serpent tattoos climbing up his arms instantly made Johnny feel ill-at-ease.

Johnny: Eh, who on Earth are you?

Drake sniggers before suddenly grabbing Johnny by the throat and throwing him against the wall. Without breaking his calm, he holds him up by the throat alone as he addressed him.

Drake Hazard: I 'spose that makes you feel like a big man, huh? Tryin' to piss on the 'new guy'…

Seemingly more concerned with the lack of oxygen reaching his lungs, Johnny doesn't even attempt to respond as he clasps at the man's grip, franticly trying to release it.

Bryan: Come o-

Hazard swiftly turns his head in Bryan's direction as soon as he opens his mouth.

Drake Hazard: Was I talkin' to you, ya little turd?

Bryan backs down immediately, taking a step backwards.

Bryan: No… no you weren't…

Drake Hazard: Keep it shut then.

He turns his attentions back towards Johnny, whose face is growing red as his struggle continues. Drake, on the other hand, appears to be showing very little physical exertion at all.

Drake Hazard: Now then, I suggest you pay a little more attention to the advice your little bitch sidekick is tellin' you here; it'll serve ya well. Seeing as this is your first strike, I'm going to let you off with your little discrepancy, but should it happen again… well, lets just say I might not be as accommodating. D'ya understand?

Johnny, despite having taken everything that the man has said in, doesn't respond, still trying to break his grip. This seemingly angers the figure who leans in a little bit closer to Johnny's face.

Drake Hazard: I said, ya little fuck, do ya understand what I'm sayin'?

Sensing the anger in his adversary's voice Johnny is able to muster a feeble nod. A wide grin grows across the man's face.

Drake Hazard: Good.

And just like that he immediately releases his grip, dropping the ring crew worker down to the floor in a heap. He walks off, flashing a grin and a wink at Bryan, sending shivers down Bryan's spine. Noticing Johnny coughing and spluttering on the floor, Bryan soon darts over to his assistance, kneeling down and helping the hoarse worker to his feet.

Bryan: Jesus Christ Johnny, what did I tell you?

Johnny cannot respond through the rough-sounding coughs. The camera follows Drake as he continues on his way down the hall, only to walk right into NLW Commissioner Harvey Danger who doesn't look too pleased.

Harvey Danger: Hey! Hazard! What are you doing!? You can't just beat up the ring crew, you're not even on the roster!

Drake snarls, laughing off the threat.

Drake Hazard: Oh yea? You gonna stop me?

The man mountain leans into Harvey Danger's face, sending a shiver down the spine of the NLW Commish. Nonetheless Harvey attempts to stand his ground.

Harvey Danger: Yeah, give me one good reason why I shouldn't just call the cops and get you thrown out of here!

Drake Hazard: Because you don't have the balls, little man…

Clearly intimidated by the presence and reputation that Drake Hazard carries around with him, Harvey swallows. He takes a step back as the former pit fighting leans in further.

Drake Hazard: So the question is, how you gonna get rid of me?

Drake steps forward as Danger backs into a wall.

Drake Hazard: I suggest you give me what I want, because lets be honest… a little weed like you ain't gon' be able to driver me outta here.

Harvey Danger: And what do you want?

Drake Hazard: A contract.

Harvey Danger: I-I can't do that! Jack'll never allow it…

Hazard chuckles to himself.

Drake Hazard: You gonna make me do something I might regret, bitch?

Grinning, Drake shoves his hand threateningly into Harvey's chest.

Harvey Danger: But I can't just straight-up GIVE you a contract! You're gonna have to earn it… through a match.

Drake Hazard: Fine, I don't care, throw all you've got at me. Bitches ain't even fit to clean the shit off my boots anyway. How about that little shitbag I beat up last week?

Harvey Danger: Jay Randall!?! Are you insane, he can hardly walk after what you did to him last week!

Drake Hazard: You think I give a fuck about that rat's wellbeing?

Danger takes a sidestep away from the much larger Hazard. Knowing that pissing off the giant further would probably be a very stupid move on his behalf, he eventually is forced to cave in.

Harvey Danger: All right, you've got it… you and Jay Randall, one on one, TONIGHT! If you win, you're in… if not, you never come back!

Again Drake laughs.

Drake Hazard: Ya know what? That's the best decision you've made in your entire life.

And with that the giant strolls off back down the corridor, leaving the disgraced commissioner in his wake.

Caelan Tyler: Jack is not going to like this at all.

Jake Steel: I will though, Drake is gonna own that bitch!

One Fall
Pendragon versus Aphrodisia

Both competitors are making their singles debuts here, having teamed up last show. Pendragon takes control early in the match, using his power and size to his advantage. Aphrodisia shows her toughness in hanging in there, and she continues to wear him down with a variety of high flying and impact moves. Aphrodisia is eventually able to keep control, putting Pendragon away with The French Kiss.

Caelan Tyler: She may have one of the more unique finishers here in NLW, but it's been effective as Aphrodisia picks up her second win in a row with the move.

Jake Steel: Yeah, just what NLW really needs, more crazy bitches.

Caelan Tyler: One of these days you'll say that to the wrong person.

Notice Given

The camera cuts to the backstage area, where Charisma Finch is standing with microphone in hand.

Charisma Finch: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time…The Phoenix.

Phoenix walks in from the right of the camera shot to a mixed reaction from the St. Louis crowd, wearing a Todd Heap (Ravens) jersey since he had already competed.

Charisma Finch: You're not known for your interviews, so if I may ask, why did you request this time?

The Phoenix: The answer, Ms. Finch, is quite simple. Let's start six weeks ago, when the so-called 'Marvelous' One, Mario Maurako, was within moments of submitting before interference ruined the match. Then, two weeks ago, when a measure of revenge was finally gained as the man who ran interference in the aforementioned Anarchy X title match, The Ice Man, was forced to submit to me. Using those qualifications, one could make the assumption that I should be the current champion, or at the very least the top contender for said title.

Charisma Finch: So are you asking for an Anarchy X championship match, then?

Phoenix shakes his head as he replies.

The Phoenix: No, I am not-not at the present, at any rate. It may sound foolish, but right now there is too much chaos surrounding the title. You have Ice Man's contractual title match happening later this eve, then the title shot awarded to Black Phoenix that was earned two weeks ago. As such…the title hunt befits the name of the title it surrounds. I am a patient man; I can wait a few weeks.

The camera zooms in a little as Phoenix turns to look directly at it.

The Phoenix: But I will say this. I am putting whoever ends up being the Anarchy X champion on notice. At some point in the future, I will be coming for my title shot that I feel I rightfully deserve. Consider this your only warning. It matters not to me whether it is Maurako, Ice Man, Black Phoenix…or even this Murrr the Janitor or Scoot Time I keep hearing about, whoever they might be.

In the end, I will be gunning for the ten pounds of leather and gold that is the Anarchy X championship belt-a belt that I feel I should be holding at this very moment. That, I promise, will be reality.

Charisma Finch:: What of the current issue concerning the recent abduction of The Ice Man and his nephew?

A cold, determined stare camera answers her before he verbally replies.

The Phoenix: I've told the authorities this to their satisfaction, and I'm telling you and everyone watching this broadcast now. I had nothing--I repeat, NOTHING--to do with his kidnapping. If I have a problem with anyone, I'll confront them about it, plain and simple. Kidnapping is not something I do; it goes against my code of ethics.
I realize that Ice will likely think that despite all evidence and proof to the contrary, I am to blame. I cannot stop him from thinking so, but if I am threatened, I will take action. Ice, the ball is in your court. Make your move.

Charisma Finch: Jake, Caelan…back to you at ringside.

Caelan Tyler: I hope that situation works out for The Phoenix, I'd hate to see one of our wrestlers sidelined for something they didn't do.

Jake Steel: If he was involved I say you lock him up and throw away the key!

One Fall
Kylo versus War Machine

The match was a back and forth affair until Kylo charges in with a clothesline but War Machine ducks, causing Kylo to catch the referee by accident. Kylo examines what he's done before turning around into a dropkick from War Machine. The impact sends Kylo over the top rope and crashing down to ringside.

War Machine climbs out of the ring and begins taking advantage of the ref being out by grabbing the ring bell. He motions for Kylo to get to his feet as Kylo struggles to rise. Machine takes a swing at Kylo with the bell but it's ducked but immediately swings again catching Kylo square in the face and busting him open.

War Machines admires the work he has done by posing for the crowd. Kylo begins to show signs of life as he rubs his hands across his face. As he notices the blood on his head his eyes grow large. He pulls himself up and looks on at the back of War Machine, venom in his eyes. War Machine must have seen Kylo out of the corner of his eye as he immediately lunges at him with a super kick. Kylo dodges however, only to retaliate by nailing a super kick of his own. War Machine collapses to the ground and Kylo head to the time keeper. He demands the chair and receives it before tossing it into the ring.

Kylo now has War Machine up and begins sliding him into the ring. Like a man possessed, Kylo picks War Machine up and drags him close to the chair. Then out of nowhere he hits The Downer, sending War Machine face first into the chair and busting face open.

Kylo rolls War Machine off the chair and tosses it out of the ring before bring the ref up to his feet. Instead of pinning Kylo locks in a crossface, pulling back ferociously on the head of War Machine, who isn't even conscious. As the ref regains himself he drops to the mat to check on Machine. When he gets no response he begins to raise the arm and watches it fall back to the mat. He tries again with the same result. He lifts the arm for the third and final time as it again hits the mat. The referee calls for the bell as Kylo keeps the hold locked on for a few moments until releasing.

Caelan Tyler: Kylo picked up the win there, but he snapped!

Jake Steel: See, there's the vicious bastard I was able to tolerate!

Caelan Tyler: I wonder why he snapped like that.

Jake Steel: Who cares? It was damn fun to watch!

Progress Report

The camera shifts to a hotel on the other side of St. Louis, closing in on one well-lit room in particular. Transition fade to the interior of the aforementioned room, where one can see that Uprising is being shown on the television. Off camera, a female's voice can be heard.

Voice:: No, you did well enough. Pause. No, everyone seems to think that.

A figure can be seen in the mirror for but a fleeting moment--or is that just the viewer's imagination?--before the voice picks up again.

Voice:: True. You make a good point. Very well, make it so, then. Another pause. Do you have the items you were sent to get…good. Get Phase 2 started now, and call me again when it is ready.

There is another pause, this one somewhat lengthy before the voice speaks again.

Voice:: Look, you let me deal with him. I know all about how he works and what makes him tick. I assure you, his theme song will be quite appropriate very soon. Keep me updated.

The 'click' of a cell phone being shut is easily apparent before all of the lights suddenly go out. Amidst the flickering light of the television (now almost as dark as the room) we hear a bit of commotion before the screen cuts to static as we hear the cameraman grunt in pain…and then silence before we cut back to our announcers at ringside.

Caelan Tyler: What in the hell was that all about?

Jake Steel: I have one better for you-who was that woman?

Caelan Tyler: You must have seen something I didn't, Jake. I only heard a woman's voice, but regardless…someone has some bad intentions for a member of our roster!

One Fall
Jay Randall versus Drake Hazard

We come back to the arena to find the heavily-injured Jay Randall already in the ring, 'Arrived' by Brand New Sin ringing out. His stomach is almost completely bandaged up and his face is covered with small plasters after the beating he took from Hazard at Uprising 3.

Jake Steel: Ladies and Gentlemen, what a shocking turn of events here tonight! Drake Hazard shows up tonight looking for a contract, Harvey Danger eventually caves in and promises him one if he beats the injured Jay Randall!

Caelan Tyler: Tonight, Jake, baaaad things are going to happen to Jay Randall. How the hell is he supposed to compete here, just LOOK at him! Especially against a brute like Hazard… this is NOT going to be pretty…

Zach King: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is an unofficial NLW match, with Drake Hazard's NLW contract in the balance! Introducing first, in the ring, from New Orleans, Louisiana… JAY RANDALL!

The crowd cheer on the name of Jay Randall, hoping that he can somehow overcome the mammoth Hazard. However their good vibes are soon wrecked.

'I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!'

Bleeding Through's 'For Love & Failing' explodes from the speakers with the force of an atomic bomb. Drake Hazard steps out from the backstage area as the arena fills with jeers.

I'm not afraid of the worst,
I'm the sheep who lost his way,
Still looking for it every day.

I'll face neglect, every curse you wish to throw at me,
Without trying I would never fail,
And I fell in love with failure.

Drake beats his chest and lets out an almighty roar as pyro fizzles away behind him, before beginning his descent to the ring. He glances around the legions of jeering fans with a spiteful grin etched across his face as he strides down the ramp.

I can't see through your eyes,
What do you see, a disgrace, another lie?
Today I'll start being perfect,
Cut you open to expose your insides,
Cut you open, expose your insides.

Eventually the giant Hazard reaches the ring and slips in under the bottom rope. He immediately heads for the opposite side of the ring and throws an arm in the air, revelling in the negative reaction of the NLW fans.

I know, I'm still counting scars from every time you cried,
'Cause I remember the first time you, died,
Tonight I want to bleed alone with you,
Here's to craving, everything you do.

Jake Steel: This could very well be the last time we EVER see Randall on an NLW broadcast! Given Randall's injuries, the chances of him walking out of here tonight on his own accord seem very slim indeed.

Caelan Tyler: There is no chance in hell that Randall is going to defeat Hazard here, Truth! That's ridiculous! In fact, I doubt very, very highly that 'The Vagabond' will even be able to knock Hazard to the floor for a split second, let alone for a three count. Unfortunately for the rookie, it ends here tonight.

Zach King: Aaaaaand his opponent, from Detroit, Michigan… weighing in at 325lbs… DRAKE HAZARD!

Jay stops at the foot of the ramp and stares his mammoth opponent dead in the eye. Suddenly, he charges into the eye of the storm, slipping under the bottom rope, and diving shoulder-first into the gut of Hazard, taking the beast down with a heavy tackle. The crowd explodes into life as a driven Jay Randall throws punch after punch against Hazard's skull.

Caelan Tyler: And here we go! Jay Randall is wasting little time! He's gonna go all guns blazing here against Drake Hazard!

Jake Steel: He's going to have to if he wants to survive tonight!

Jay continues to throw his fists into Hazard's face, but unfortunately for Jay, if there was one thing this monster could do it was absorb pain. Between blows Hazard finds the strength to grab Randall by the collar and throw him halfway across the ring. A little dazed, Jay lands on his backside, and watches on in surprise as Hazard rises to his feet, hardly shaken at all by Jay's assault.

Jake Steel: Just take a look at Drake Hazard! He was hardly fazed AT ALL by those shots to the skull there!

As Randall gets to his feet, Hazard charges towards him, looking for a clothesline. Fortunately, Randall manages to duck just in time, narrowly avoiding certain decapitation. Using his slight speed advantage, Jay manages to land a low dropkick to the back of Hazard's knees before the giant has time to turn around. As a natural reaction, Hazard falls to one knee, before Jay seizes his neck, locking in a tight sleeper hold on the giant.

Jake Steel: Uh-uh! That ain't gonna work! How the hell does Jay expect he's going to choke Hazard out!?!

Sure enough, Hazard soon gets back up on both feet, Jay Randall clinging onto him for dear life. Hazard struggles to dislodge Randall, tossing and turning his body in effort to release Jay's grip.

Jake Steel: It seems to be working Caelan, look! Hazard can't get him off!

Jinx. As the words leave Jake's mouth, Hazard manages to grab the back of Jay's head, and toss him over the top of his own head. By complete fluke, Jay manages to land on his feet, and after steadying his balance he turns to face his gargantuan opponent with wide eyes. A 'RANDALL!' chant begins to break out in the arena, the crowd attempting to spur on Jay's thankless task.

Jake Steel: Oh God… this is where Randall does NOT want to meet Hazard; head on!

Channelling the crowd's energy, Jay throws a punch at Hazard's jaw. Given by the fact that this doesn't even cause Drake to shift his gaze, this felt like a fly on a windshield to him. Jay launches forward with another punch, AGAIN Hazard seemingly doesn't feel it. Randall steps back in disbelief; he knew that Hazard was a tough competitor, but he didn't think the effects would have been quite so drastic. Swallowing hard, Jay charged forward, aiming to clothesline - instead, he was met with a big boot; Hazard's foot connecting with Jay's jaw with a sickening thud.

Caelan Tyler: Jesus H.! Did you hear that connection!?! I think Randall may have just lost a couple of teeth!

Jake Steel: That's it! That's the beginning of the end! Drake Hazard just DESTROYED Jay Randall's jaw!

Grabbing his jaw in pain, Jay sits up, but before he can get to his feet he is hauled up by Hazard, who shows terrifying strength to lift the NLW rookie a couple of feet off the ground, before throwing him full-force into the turnbuckles!

Jake Steel: OH MY GOD! Did you see that!?! I think the whole ring just shuddered!

Jay manages a groggy step forward, holding his back in sheer agony, before the pain gets the better of him and he falls back into the turnbuckles.

Caelan Tyler: This is bad, bad news for Randall! He is at Hazard's mercy now… and with that SICKENING blow, could Randall have picked up ANOTHER injury?!

Jake Steel: He doesn't stand a chance Cael, this guy is going to swat him like a fly.

Caelan Tyler: What was Harvey Danger even thinking about giving this guy a match!?! He's a MANIAC!

The fans jeering intensely, Hazard begins to throw his giant fists against Randall's broken torso, each blow hitting Jay as if it were sledgehammer shot. Randall slumps down to the bottom turnbuckle as Hazard continues his onslaught by stomping away at the rookie.

Caelan Tyler: After a bright enough start Randall has began to fade away, the referee might as well just call the bell right now! This thing is OVER!

Hazard turns his back on Jay; even men of his size need to catch their breath once in a while. However, when he turns around he is taken aback by a swift superkick to the chest, the crowd explodes!

Caelan Tyler: My god! Where the hell did that come from!?!

Unfortunately, while the kick causes Hazard to stagger backwards somewhat, it saps much of Jay's energy from his body.

Jake Steel: But that kick has taken a LOT of out Randall! Look at him, he can barely stand…

Caelan Tyler: What do you expect!?! Look at the size difference! And add that to the fact that Randall is injured, this is hardly fair!

It takes a slip second for Hazard to recover, and grabs Jay's neck with an iron grip. Everyone in the arena knows what's coming, as Hazard effortlessly lifts Jay off of the ground and SLAMS him down with a massive chokeslam. Jeers rain down on the beast, who lets out a victorious roar.

Caelan Tyler: You could feel the impact of that chokeslam from where we sit, folks! Randall's out cold, Hazard's got this one won!

Jake Steel: I don't think Drake's done yet! He'll want to send a message to everyone in the back through a showing of sheer dominance, Cael!

Indeed, the beast isn't finished just yet. Again he hauls his opponent.

Caelan Tyler: For Pete's sake, just END this already! Jay Randall is DONE! This is disgusting…

Drake leans down, before throwing Jay across his shoulders, ready to finish the rookie once and for all. He lets another deafening roar, the crowd incensed.

Caelan Tyler: DON'T DO IT, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

Jake Steel: Goodnight Jay, it's been nice knowing you…

The former pit fighting spins round, dropping his opponent with an Inverted Death Valley Driver. With a sneer across his face he makes the cover.

1

2

3!

Caelan Tyler: Thank GOD that's over!

Jake Steel: Jay Randall's NLW career may be over! And it looks like Drake Hazard's is just beginning…

'For Love and Failing' blasts across the PA system as Drake Hazard raises his hand victoriously in the air.

Caelan Tyler: He's came here tonight and won a contract by manipulating the commissioner and beating an injured wrestler! What an absolute parasite this man is!

Jake Steel: I dunno, he's got a real meanstreak about him… I could grow to like this guy!

Caelan Tyler: How could you LIKE Drake Hazard!?! The man is scum! Trust me, I've competed with him in the past, I know what this trashbag is like…

Where's Wal… Err, Kylo

The cameras are inside the office of Jack Sullivan when Eriq Mobely barges in.

Jack Sullivan: What do you need Eriq?

Eriq Mobely: Have you seen Kylo?

Jack Sullivan: Not since his match, why?

Eriq Mobely: Well, neither have I. I don't know where he disappeared to after his match, but he isn't anywhere around.

Jack Sullivan: I'm sure he'll turn up.

Eriq Mobely: I guess, but something isn't right here; he's not been himself lately.

Jack Sullivan: I'm sure he's fine, just go back to the hotel and wait for him or something. If I see him, I'll tell him you're looking for him. I got the Path of destiny presentation up next and can't afford anymore distractions. Bad enough I got Drake to deal with now…

Path of Destiny Trophy Ceremony

Inside the ring, a red carpet has been laid over the mat and there's a large tarp covering an object that's about three feet in height. 'In My Grip' hits, and Jack Sullivan makes his way to the ring, microphone in hand. He slides into the ring, looking at the tarp before addressing the crowd.

Jack Sullivan: I'm sure it should be pretty obvious to all of you why I'm out here, and with the exception of that damn Drake Hazard incident the night is going great. To help insure I have no further incidents I made sure Kevin Heat was banned from the arena until his match, and security will be dragging him out immediately afterwards. Now then, let's get this started!

As if on cue, 'Never Know' begins to play and 'Venom' Xavier Lux makes his way to the ring, the NLW Championship proudly displayed on his shoulder. The crowd cheers as he slides into the ring, and is handed a microphone by a ring hand.

Jack Sullivan: Lux, I'd like to congratulate you for a job well done. Not only did you deal with that pain in the ass Kevin Heat, you won your second Path of Destiny tournament and your third NLW Championship. Now, last time the reward for winning the event was that belt you now have, but since this is the second time you've done it, I felt this deserved something more…

Jack removes the tarp, revealing a beautifully crafted trophy. Venom looks over the trophy, but before he could say anything 'Ego' by Element Eighty hits, and the crowd boos as Triple M walks onto the stage, mic in hand.

Jack Sullivan: Hold on now, this isn't…

Triple M: Come on now Jack, this is the perfect time for me to say my thing. I did what you asked, I made sure there wasn't any problems, that the NLW Championship match finished without incident, now I want what's coming to me.

Jack Sullivan: …There was plenty of 'incident' involved in that match, how the hell can you claim otherwise?

Triple M: Hey, all I was supposed to do is count the three.

Jack Sullivan: No, you were supposed to keep the peace, but somehow Black Phoenix still managed to get involved, and I still don't know who the other guy was.

Triple M: I still want my shot at that belt Jack.

Jack Sullivan: You know what, if you're so damn keen on it then show me. Next Uprising, you versus an opponent of my choosing, winner gets a shot at the following Uprising against Venom. That work for you Lux?

Jack looks over to Lux, who nods in agreement. Triple M grins before going to the back.

Jack Sullivan: Now, as we were getting to before we were so rudely…

Again, as if on cue, another interruption. This time, 'Suffer' by Circle of Red begins to play as the words 'No Hope' flash across the jumbotron. The fans start to cheer as the man who interrupted last Uprising makes his way to the ring. Venom looks on confused as Jack takes one look at the man and starts to swear profusely.

Jack Sullivan: God damnit no, you get the fuck out of this arena right now!

???: What's the matter Sully, can't handle seeing real talent in your ring?

Jack Sullivan: God damnit Draco!

The crowd roars as Draco is finally called by name, and Draco slides into the ring, eyeing Venom before turning to face Jack.

Draco: What, are you pissed that I decided to rain on your damn parade? Too damn bad!

Venom: Hey, I didn't need you to interfere with my damn match, I could've handled it myself!

Draco: Yeah, you really had that under control, what with the crazy bitch with the chair and all. Real good job there 'champ'.

Venom starts to fume as Draco sneers. Jack, having had enough, moves to attack Draco, but Draco ducks out of the way and kicks Jack in the gut, knocking him into the ropes. A dropkick knocks Jack over to the floor, and Draco quickly turns to face Venom, nailing him with a superkick! Venom is caught completely off-guard and rolls to the outside after the impact. Draco then picks up the trophy and hits it against the turnbuckle a few times before throwing it outside.

Draco: I think the message should be clear Jack, good old fashioned fuck with your neighbor! You tried this crap on me when I was running my company, now I'm gonna return the favor ten fold! Oh, and Venom, keep that belt looking nice, I might want it some day!

Venom tries to enter the ring, but Jack cuts him off, waving for security, who surround the ring. Shaking his head, Draco exits the ring, leaping the barricade and leaving through the crowd as Jack fumes, kicking what's left of the Path of Destiny trophy.

Caelan Tyler: What a shocking turn of events! The mystery man was Draco, and he smashed up the Path of Destiny trophy!

Caelan Tyler: God damn Jack just can't catch a break, he needs to put these bitches in their place!

What Color is He?

Backstage, The War Machine exits Harvey Danger's office in a rage. He slams the door behind him and kicks a nearby refreshment table, toppling it and dozens of drinks and desserts.

War Machine: NLW fires ME? This is bullshit! I'm much better than this!

War Machine continues down the hallway, kicking anything in his path on the way to his locker room.

Jake Steel: Oh no, we fired the Hippo?

Caelan Tyler: The ... who?

Jake Steel: Uh, hello?! The Hippo. You know, The War Machine, Hippo?

Caelan Tyler: That's not his name, stupid ass.

Jake Steel: Are you sure? Isn't that SOMEone's name? I swear I've heard it before.

Caelan Tyler: Not in NLW. Besides, it's not a hippo. It's another animal, and because of copyright infringement, that's all I can say...

War Machine kicks open his locker room door so hard, it hits the wall inside and slams shut again, butchering his nose. He cries aloud and slings it open again, this time trying to avoid looks and laughter from passers-by. He stops inside the doorway to grab his bag, but from the ceiling falls a large flower pot, which cracks over his head, taking him out like a light. His body slouches to the floor, unconscious.

Caelan Tyler: What the hell? It's raining flower pots, Jake.

Suddenly, El Chimpador swings from the ceiling and drops to the ground beside War Machine. He yanks his shades off and pulls a cell phone from a belt around his tiny waste. He holds a keypad button, and rings Josh Allen, who's in Tallahassee.

Josh Allen: Chimpy?! ... Uh huh! ... Uh huh! ... So you took out Grobschnit! Excel- wait, what do you mean you aren't sure it's Grobby? ...

Jake Steel: Uhm, that's not Grobschnit, fellas. Er, fella, and monkey ...

Chimpy: Ooh oooh, ah, ugh!

Josh Allen: What color is he Chimpy? Is he green? ... What do you mean you were born color blind?! ... Grrr, damn it. ... Alright, fine. Is he tall? ... He is? ... Then that's not the Grobster. Alright, get the hell out of there. Lay low until I fly back. Andy Murray's not down here, but some totally fake-ass lookalike tried to convince me HE was Murray. I had to take him out, Chimpy ... it's getting dangerous. Leave no monkey prints, and get out for this week. We'll regroup and try again next time.

With that, Chimpy shuts his cell phone and, with a bit of trouble, finally gets it back into the carrying case around his waist. Chimpy scurries out the door, leaving War Machine ... but suddenly, he stops, turns, and runs back in. He jumps on War Machine's face and gives it five seconds of monkey humps before jumping up and down on his gut and running out again, disappearing for good this time.

Jake Steel: Ah, bestiality. Brings back memories, doesn't it, Caelan?

Caelan Tyler: Er, no. That's disgusting. And I think you're missing the overall story here. War Machine was just fired, AND, Chimpy thought he was Grobschnit. That led to War Machine being ... being ... MOLESTED by a MONKEY!

Jake Steel: You're jealous...

Tag Match
Brad Dalton and Cameron Barclay versus The Black Phoenix and Kevin Heat

The match starts off with Dalton and BP, with BP taking control quickly with a series of high impact moves. She then continued to alternate control with Heat until Dalton is able to free himself, tagging in Barclay. Barclay puts up a fight, but Heat is able to hit him with Heartburn and follows it up with The Baltimore Brand. He tags in BP, who hits Beauty That Burns to pick up the victory.

Caelan Tyler: Kevin Heat and Black Phoenix both worked well together here, this pairing should be something to be feared for other people in NLW.

Jake Steel: I know I'm afraid of the crazy bitch. God Jack, hire some normal chicks.

The camera then changes it focus to some sort of commotion in the audience. There you see Kylo making his way down to the ring area with a steel chair and dried blood on his face. He hops over the railing and quietly climbs into the ring. Black Phoenix is the first to notice him and begins backing away, unbeknownst to Kevin Heat. Kylo readies his chair and stares down Black Phoenix, contemplating the use of the chair on her skull. He slowly lets his guard down just as Heat is turning around. Kylo's eyes light up and in a split second he crashes the chair into the face of Heat, sending him to the ground. Damage done Kylo turns his back and begins to walk away and The Black Phoenix checks on her partner. Kylo is nearly out of the ring when he stops and then turns back around. He looms over Black Phoenix as she looks up from the mat. With one swing he adds another dent to the chair, laying Black Phoenix out beside her partner. Kylo then drops the chair and looks over the carnage. His expression then changes to that of confusion before he hurries out of the ring. He hops the railing and begins running through the crowd towards an exit.

Jake Steel: DAAAAAAMN.

Taking Care of Business

Jack paces in the backstage area, a rather pissed off look on his face as he dials his cell.

Jack Sullivan: This whole god damn show has gone fubar… Hello? Yes, it's Jack! Listen, I got a problem and I need some help to deal with it. Draco decided to show up. Yeah, the same Draco, that damn prick doesn't know when to die. Not only that, Josh Allen has decided to start attacking people I don't even have under contract! I can get sued for that shit! You in? These fuckers need to be taught a lesson… Yeah? Great, see you in Houston Linchy…

Jack hangs up the phone as a huge smile comes to his face as the scene cuts to ringside.

Caelan Tyler: …Linchy?! El Linchador? In NLW?!?

Jake Steel: Holy shit that'll be awesome!

Cage Match for the Anarchy X Championship
'Marvelous' Mario Maurako versus The Ice Man

The Ice Man starts off in control of the match, using the cage to his advantage by slamming Triple M into it repeatedly before Triple M is able to get back into the match with the Super Mario. The fight continues to go back and forth until Triple M hits the Simply Marvelous, deciding to exit the ring via the door. Before Triple M could escape, The Phoenix makes his way to the ring, slamming the door hard across Triple M's skull. Triple M falls back into the ring, and falls victim to The Ice Pick, which keeps him down long enough for The Ice Man to escape and win the match. The Ice Man grabs his belt and holds it up high, staring down The Phoenix as the show draws to a close…

NLW is owned by Matt Ladwig © 2008. Coding installed by Andy Murray, powered by EWShow v1.0 by Aaron Burkowski.