What...? Am I still here? After my humiliating loss to Ray Lopes? Yes, I am. I've not bunked off to OWF, because I know that's closing soon. I've not accepted the offer I recieved from TNT Wrestling Academy, because frankly it looks cheapo, unlike my wrestling gear.

The reason I'm still in New Legends Wrestling is because it's the only promotion left in America. I don't want to have to move to Japan, the Japanese dislike me. I dislike them, too. Sullen Sully gives me a title shot every once in a while just to keep me happy. But I'm not happy, but I have to stay.

Sooner or later, Sullen Sully will figure that out.

I don't really want to talk about my opponents, but there's something about me, as there is with every good wrestler, that you just have to cut a promo or fire cheap shots at the enemy. I have plenty of ammunition, time to use it.

First...Why the Black Pheonix? Isn't that racist? Everything else is these days, you can't even sing baa baa black sheep.

I DON'T LIKE RAINBOW SHEEP!!!!

Seriously, I was offended along with many Canadians when I was watching a comedy show re-run, it went something like this...

So..you like sport?

Yeah, yeah, I like sport.

What do you think about the hockey strike?

What hockey strike?

Y'know the hockey strike, NHL...

Oooh that hockey strike, I remember that, there were white guys in the street yelling 'OH NO!!! HOCKEY IS GONE!! WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO!!?? THANK GOD WE HAVE NASCAR!!!'

I'll tell you what we're gonna do...we're gonna take a hockey stick and shove it straight up you candy ass! But...I'm rambling...which is good, I suppose. Takes my mind off a lot of things...such as how UGLY is Jin Royale?
It's like Jesse Williams, a chimp and Joe Bugner had a threesome and that...is what came out. I mean SERIOUSLY!?? I know not everyone has the same looks as me, but c'mon, that's despicable. It's a crime to be wearing that face in public, wear a mask or something.

Clearly, I've not researched my opponents, but to be frank, do I need to? They don't exactly sound like anything difficult. The Black Pheonix, who I believe was in OWF, sounds like some rip-off of The Pheonix, or at least a poor prequel. Jin Royale sounds like a mixture of beer and a James Bond movie. Personally I think that would lead to suicide, but whatever. Blame the parents. All three of them.

I think I've proved my point, whatever that is.